"There was a woman who had suffered terribly from severe bleeding for twelve years, even though she had been treated by many doctors. She had spent all her money, but instead of getting better she got worse all the time. She had heard about Jesus, so she came in the crowd behind him, saying to herself, “If I just touch his clothes, I will get well.”
She touched his cloak, and her bleeding stopped at once; and she had the feeling inside herself that she was healed of her trouble." Mark 5:25-29
"But to keep me from being puffed up with pride because of the many wonderful things I saw, I was given a painful physical ailment, which acts as Satan's messenger to beat me and keep me from being proud. Three times I prayed to the Lord about this and asked him to take it away. But his answer was: `My grace is enough for you, for My power is perfected in infirmity;' most gladly, therefore, will I boast in my infirmities, that the power of the Christ may rest on me. Therefore, I am well pleased in infirmities, in damages, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses -- for Christ; for whenever I am infirm, then I am powerful." 2 Corinthians 2:9-10
If I had to pick the outcome of one of these two scriptures to be my own, I would initially prefer to follow in the footsteps of the lady in Mark 5 rather than Paul in 2 Corinthians. The woman had suffered greatly for years, gone through endless medical procedures, doctor visits, tests, and treatments, but she pushed through the crowd, grabbed hold of Jesus, and was instantly healed of her trouble. On the flipside, Paul asked God three times to take his ailment away before he finally realized that his physical healing wasn't actually the big deal. When Paul asked God to remove the thorn in his flesh, God didn't refuse to give him a good gift of healing and wholeness. God wasn't turning away and leaving Paul to wallow in his pain. What Satan meant for Paul's distraction, Paul embraced as an opportunity to be humbled, and God used as an opportunity to show Paul how His grace was enough to get him through. God was actually taking Paul by the hand and giving him the better thing as he poured out grace and power in his life regardless of his physical condition. Paul was asking for his symptoms to go away, God was looking for an opportunity to show Paul just how powerful He is to triumph not only over but also through his symptoms. My body right now is telling me "give me the healing and let me learn the lesson later!" But maybe that is not the best perspective to have.
If I'm being honest, my end goal in life is not to be well and take it easy. On days like today, I'm tempted to make that my end goal, but I know in my heart that there is something I want more. More than feeling well physically, I want to be able to say that no matter what Im facing, my soul rests secure. I want to be able to say that no matter how I feel, God's grace is enough for me. God's power was perfected in Paul's life through his infirmity, and because of his infirmity, he learned to function inside of the power or Christ. Paul could not think for a moment that he was accomplishing anything on his own. He had to rely on God's hand at work in his life to make it through each day, each moment, and each challenge.
I am definitely not giving up on being well in my body. Like the woman in Mark, I am still pressing my way through the crowd and grabbing hold of Jesus. I am still placing my faith in the God who took my sickness and my suffering on the cross so that I can be free from it. I am also realizing, however, that God's grace is enough for me today. I see that what Satan meant to distract me, God is using to teach me about his goodness and his faithfulness in my life. If I go to sleep tonight still feeling this sickness in my body, I have more than enough to do it with joy in my heart and peace in my mind. It's a weird way of thinking, but my heart embraces it as true. If I'm seeking my healing above all else, I'm missing out on seeking the face of Jesus which far surpasses in worth. If I see my trials as opportunities to draw nearer to my savior, I can't actually lose.
No comments:
Post a Comment